Zen: Zen

One of my favorite stories to share about Zen is why it took me so long to find it. I was raised Methodist (loosely), confirmed and everything. My parents continued to force some church on me through high school, although we never talked about Christ or God or anything like that at home, ever. I think it was the best they could do towards starting my path to sprituality. It's not a waste by any means, I truly think that more information can only help understanding.

So, after seeing Christianity and it's ins and outs, I figured I'd just pretend until I didn't have to anymore. It was an unconscious choice, one I made because I thought I HAD to. Still letting my parents run my life, at least in that aspect.

I checked into Buddhism, Hinduism, Islam, Daoism, and found them mostly to be the same. Doctrine, denying human pleasures, all just a means of control. The advent of organized religion was all about controlling human populations, and any organized religion is controlling by definition. So I assumed Zen belonged in the trash pile as well.

It was a guy named Osho who opened my eyes, literally. I found one book and read it. But I could only read a couple of pages at a time! I quite literally was laughing out loud, stunned at all of the things that were so obvious, yet previously hidden. I had to read 2 pages, then process it all for a while, sometimes hours. I bought book after book (they're all like $11, and 150 pages), craving more. The truth, the profound truth, tickles the brain. And stopped me from letting my brain and my past run my life.

Let me be clear, before I go much further. Zen is not enough, Zen is about having a rich inner life. Osho quite brilliantly points out, it's about having a rich outer life AND a rich inner life. So while Zen is close, and clearly on the right path, it stops short of what I believe is the true nature of existence.

So, let me give you an example of my life, back from when I was in what I call the "unconscious" period of my life. I was in a bad relationship. I mean, BAD. 5 years in, pretty sure she was cheating on me repeatedly. And yet I didn't think I was able to break up with her, not without proof. So I stayed. I thought that the universe controlled me, I just had to go along with the options it presented me. Incidentally, I finally did catch her cheating, like knock-on-the-car-window busted. Twice. That's when I left, after I thought I had satisfied some external judge's requirements for breaking up.

Now I take responsibility for every single thing in my life. My happiness every day is my own creation. And therefore, I'm happy every day. If something comes up, and I'm angry, sad, apathetic, you name it, I deal with it immediately. I step back, identify the issue, or the story, and transform it. Zen made this possible. In college, I used to walk around campus, staring at the sidewalk, avoiding any eye contact. I lived alone and felt like I deserved it. I was a willing martyr, letting others control my life and then feeling sorry for myself when things went bad. Which, let's face it, was often, thanks to my low expectations.

Now, for contrast, if I find myself in an undesirable relationship, with anyone at all, I end it or take responsibility for it's failings.

Now I am happy every day. I have a beatuiful wife who makes me abundantly joyful, I live where other people vacation, and I'm starting my own company. I have an office-window view that on a scale of 1-10 is a 42. My awakening was the first step to becoming my true self. And so much of Zen will help you find that in yourself too.

Because that right there is THE difference that suggested to me that Zen was different than other organized religions. Zen promotes each person to find the truth themselves. Their own inner truth. Because that's the only existence we can know. Don't let other people tell you things about who you are, who your god is, and what you deserve. No one knows what happens in the afterlife, all we know is that no one ever comes back. Maybe.

Zen invites each person to participate in this life, their one and only existence. Don't watch your life go by. The experience IS our existence. Don't fight against it, embrace it. As I like to ask myself when I'm stuck in my head, "Who are you to think you know better than existence?" Or, I recently realized another way to explain it.

People say "things always happen for a reason." That's cleverness, that's the mind. Too fancy. Zen is, "Things happen. Period." If you understand that, you will find inner peace like you may not have known before.

If you want the book I referred to above, it's titled simply, Awareness. It's the best $11 book you'll ever buy.